update on Kain

I met with the therapist on Wednesday. It was just an initial meeting, to set treatment goals and that kind of thing. Mainly, our goals for now are to get him to handle frustration better, without raging. I have lots of other goals for him :), but that's the main one, the one that landed him in the hospital. When I was describing some of his other odd behaviors to him, she wanted to know why asperger's had ever been ruled out for him. For example, when he came down to therapy, he had this green jacket on. I had picked it up for him at the thrift store a couple of weeks previously. It's nothing fancy, just a bright green zip up jacket. He has been wearing it non-stop ever since. Day and night, when it is far too warm to wear it, red faced with sweat running down his head, wearing that jacket. He has lots of odd little things like this. Anyway, I told her I didn't rule it out, his psychiatrist did. She thinks he's just very immature. And really, a lot of his odd behaviors wouldn't seem so odd if they were happening in a much younger child. So maybe it is just immaturity. Who knows. It doesn't really matter much to me, practically speaking, what the official diagnosis is.

She also said that he would be considered an acute patient for a week to ten days. Then he could go home or stay in subacute care for several weeks. She wanted to know what I wanted, and I said I wasn't ready for him to come home yet. I felt kind of bad about that, but there it is. I've been guiltily enjoying the peace and quiet, honestly. But then last night, I couldn't sleep. I was worrying about Kain, feeling badly that he didn't have anyone to read to him and tuck him in, wondering if he was homesick, hoping that he knew, really knew, that I did love him, that I do want him here, just minus the ugly behaviors. I impulsively got out of bed and called the hospital, and the nurse told me she had just come on shift and really couldn't tell me much. She said the offgoing shift had said that Kain has been feeding into negative behaviors. The therapist said the same thing. I don't really know what that means. I think it means that when another child is acting up, he does to. I can see that. It's largely why we homeschool him, he has a nose for sniffing out the worst behaved child in a group and following them like a puppy dog.

I found this in my paper pile today. Maria colored it a few months ago, before Tess was born. Isn't this a therapist's dream come true?



I don't know if you can see this well enough to tell, but this is a family picture. Our names are written in the different parts of the picture. It says, "MOM" in the grass, "DAD" in the sun, "JACK" in the water, and "MARIA" is written in the purple of the sunset, and Kain? Why, it says "KAIN" in the black cloud over head. Sigh.