Monday, August 25, 2008

If it makes you feel any better....

I've read recently, and not for the first time, that people don't like to read homeschooling blogs because they make them feel inadequate with what they do in their own home. I think it's true that we do tend to post the best of what we do on our blogs, though I do honestly try to give a view of my "dark side" once in a while. :) But just to make sure you leave here feeling completely adequate...

----Sometimes I yell at my kids.

----Sometimes I yell at my husband.

----Sometimes I yell at the cats.

----My house is cluttered in a major way. Seriously. Come over, it'd make anyone feel better.

----My backyard is an overgrown amazon rainforest because neither I nor my husband have had time to do anything more than ride the mower around all summer.

----I have a package sitting on the counter to send to my mother in law for her birthday. Her birthday was last week.

----We're already behind where we are "supposed" to be on our syllabi.

----My living room is edged with a layer of popcorn because I didn't bother to break out the attachment on the vacuum to clean along the walls since I don't know when. Then the vacuum cleaner broke. That was two weeks ago.

---I haven't done "spring cleaning" since Jack was born. He'll be four in October.

---I didn't feel like cooking dinner tonight. So when I stopped at the store to get milk, I also got a package of buns and hot dogs. Not the healthy kind. The kind filled with nitrates and other carcinogens. I figured it was still healthier than McDonald's.

---Almost every morning, when I try to have my prayer time, I fall asleep.

---My favorite fantasy involves checking into a hotel room. Without my kids. And without my husband. Alone. Then I fall asleep, and sleep until I wake up all on my own, without being awakened by anyone. Then I get some awesome Mexican take-out, a bottle of Corona, and watch a whole movie without stopping once to chase a child back to bed or soak poo out of someone's pajama pants. And then I sleep some more.

---I really, really love my kids. I really, really love my husband. I love homeschooling. But I really butcher things up sometimes with all of them. Sometimes I do something stunningly well. And other times I really blow it. Most all of the time I'm somewhere in the middle. I bet you're the same way, huh?

Some of the blogs I read (like the ones listed on the right) do present life as pretty darned perfect. They inspire me though. There's something I identify with there. Other blogs I have read and they rubbed me the wrong way for one reason or another, so I quit going there. (This doesn't mean that if your blog isn't listed that I don't like your blog! It means I need to update my list!) Blogs seem to have personalities all their own, don't they? I doubt my blog would make anyone feel inferior. :) I do try really hard to show the "realness" here. And I'm not accomplishing any feats of greatness in homeschooling or anything else. But it's human nature to present our best I guess. So take my blog, and anyone else's, for what it is....sharing what works for us, what we enjoy, and know that for every great moment you read about on someone's blog there are likely a dozen not so shining ones they didn't share. If my blog makes you smile, then I am beyond honored. If reading blogs, even my blog, makes you feel inferior, then leave it. Find another way to connect, through yahoo groups or message boards, or if you are lucky enough, "real life friends", but don't do something that makes you feel discouraged, not for one minute longer! There's enough to discourage us out there without looking for actively looking for discouragement.
Being a good mother is HARD. Look for things that lift you up. God bless you!


Jennie C. said...

Amen! I've had trouble thinking of things to write about lately, because life wasn't so rosy. It still isn't today, though today was much better than last week!

mysteryhistorymom said...

I LOVE IT! Melanie- You always make me feel better!:-) Lori

Alice Gunther said...

A nice post!

The popcorn, in particular, tells me you are a kindred spirit! :)

Cheryl said...

I can relate to this post. The hotel fantasy sounds appealing. And we had hot dogs and white bread buns for dinner last night (along with some Hot Pockets.) The baby picture in the sidebar is very cute.

Terimisu said...

You are hilarious Melanie. a great mom and loyal friend. It makes my day whenever I read your blog. I miss seeing you guys though...

Kelly said...

LOL - just to note, my blog is NOT one of those that presents a perfect life. ;) I am SO right there with you!

And that fantasy - yep, that is almost verbatim my own secret fantasy LOL! Only without the corona - I'd sit and guzzle a "slushy" coke instead. Maybe we could get adjoining rooms and watch a flick together - once we were both awake all on our own of course! ;)

Lisa said...

So glad to see that we are all in the same boat! Thanks!:-)

The Fabulous Mrs. F said...

This does make me feel better. Sometimes I wonder if everyone else's house looks like a magazine photo and if they ever feel like pounding their head against a brick wall after talking with their teen (less of that lately, thank you God).

A nice remeinder that there is some give and take in mothering, and that perfection is not required or expected.

KerryK said...

Yes, it does make me feel better! : )

Anonymous said...


This is coming a little late since I am fairly new to this blogging stuff and I am finally getting around to parusing some of your posts, but AMEN to this post! I just said to my husband today that after reading some of the other blogs, I really feel inadequate with far from perfect children. That's why I really enjoy reading your blog. It's sooo real and I always come away with a smile on my face and uplifted AND inspired to keep going.